Jayden-a quick reincarnation

While working on the energy of a young client named Jayden I kept experiencing pain running down the right side of my body, culminating in the shoulder blade. As I tapped into the pain I kept hearing “mum did it, it was mum”. I asked my guides to show me what I was sensing, and I was immediately transported to a time in history that felt medieval and rural.

Jayden had come to see me to work on their gender dysphoria and to heal childhood trauma in their relationship with their mother. They had a history of abuse and manipulation and their relationship had forced Jayden to turn their back on their mother and forge a life of their own.

In my minds eye, I saw my client as a young man that looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. His mother walked through the door of the house and immediately rounded on him. “Where have you been?” she screamed. She yelled at him about shirking his responsibilities and that he was now the man of the house as his father had walked out. She said “I need you to be the man, step up and take care of us.” I could tell the burden was a heavy one, with a farm to tend to and small children who also needed to be fed. I asked Jayden's past-life self to show me where he had been and he took me to a secret rendezvous with a young woman. They were in love and were hoping to be married. It was clear that she lived in a little more poverty than Jayden but he did not care. She had two children and was widowed, and Jayden was happy with this as, he explained to me, that he could not father children. There had been some sort of injury when he was a small boy that had disfigured him and rendered him infertile, a fact that his mother used to taunt him as not being “man enough”. He loved the young woman. He went home and told his mother that he was going to be married and she, and her children, were going to come and live with them. His mother flew into a rage, telling him that he could not marry a girl with nothing, no dowry, no honour. He said he didn’t care but his mother continued; “she will put us in the poor house, eat us out of house and home, use what’s ours to feed her lot and we will suffer for your stupidity”. Jayden pleaded and promised, begged, and tried to reason but she would have none of it. Jayden thought that with time he would convince his mother of their love and his betrothed kindness. Each day he would visit his girlfriend after doing all the work around the farm. In secret they were married in the sacred woods and he brought home his wife.

Again, his mother flew into a rage, refusing them entry to the house. He pleaded with her and finally he told her that if she would not be agreeable to the match, she left him no choice but to leave her. He told her “if you push me, I will NOT choose you mother”. Some time later he returned to the house to collect some belongings while his wife waited in a carriage outside, packed for travel. His mother could see he meant business and again they argued. As he exited the house with the last of his things she flew after him screaming, threatening and telling him that if he left he may never return. He turned on his heel to leave and as he did she drew a knife and desperately stabbed him in the back, repeatedly, right where Jayden currently experiences shoulder pain. Her desperation to not lose her son had turned to illogical violence. He died where he fell.

My Grandmother( a kind and loving spirit guide who was a grandmother figure to me in a past life) then told me that Jayden had chosen to reincarnate very quickly, carrying this wound and pattern with him and reincarnating with the same mother, destined to repeat this unresolved trauma.

Now we had an answer for the tumultuous relationship Jayden had always experienced with their mum. I brought their souls together(in their past life incarnations) and allowed them space to talk. The mother explained how she had felt so abandoned by her husband leaving that she clung to her son, terrified of him starting his own life and leaving her unprotected and undefended. Jayden explained that had she not pushed him away, he would have loyally protected her always. She was deeply sorry, and ashamed of her behaviour.  They shared a long embrace.

My Grandmother informed me that Jayden’s mother may not heal her wounds in this lifetime, and they may not resolve their relationship this time round, but we had made good ground work on healing the roots. I asked their mother to remove the knife from Jayden's energy body and, as she did, the wound immediately began to heal over. I intentioned that the mothers soul fragment be returned to the light in order to heal before being reintegrated into her 2024 self.

When I shared this with my client later they were emotional, and told me that they could feel it in their body when the knife was removed. They were grateful for the underlying truth that now helped them understand their relationship with their mother and release all the self-blame they had been carrying since childhood. They also felt the pieces in the puzzle of their gender identity coming together. Understanding that they had so recently been incarnated as a cis male helped them to understand their body dysphoria now. Also, learning that they had been disfigured in that life helped them come to terms with their own feelings of not being “man enough”, managing their bottom dysphoria and understanding their sadness around not being able to father children. This was a very enlightening session for Jayden, and they walked away feeling more settled in the truth of who they are, owning their trans identity and coming to peace with their family circumstances.